What’s your inner voice telling you?

“We all walk in the dark and each of us must learn to turn on his or her own light.” – Earl Nightingale

As a movement professional and coach I allow my clients to turn on their own light bulbs.  I’m there as a guide and a facilitator.  I’ll help them until they can do it themselves, but at Mind Body Balance we encourage our clients to be independent (not dependent on us).  There is a whole world for us to inspire to movement.

There is far greater joy and power to watch someone figure it out for themselves; and they do, as long as you create that “place” in which it’s possible that you will be there for them on the other side. Sometimes you just have to close your eyes, hope for the best and push through to the other side.

Fear is only as thick as a Kleenex.
The body is fluid and open to change.  The mind is concrete.
Overcome the concrete mind and the body is ready and willing to be freed.

When it comes to movement, we all have an Angel on one shoulder and the Devil on the other. I know I’m being cute, but think about it. We have the Angel saying, “Yes.  Yes.  Buy vegetables, attend your Pilates today.  You’ll feel better for doing so.”  Meanwhile the Devil is saying, “Ice cream, French fries, be a couch potato.   Come on, I’ve been doing this “plates” thing for five minutes it isn’t working.  Let’s leave.”
Okay so this isn’t a perfect situation of what’s in our head, but you get the point I’m trying to make. We each have two voices; one that is trying to demolish our goals and self-esteem and one that promotes our goals and self-esteem.  Some of us might have a whole committee to deal with.

I was fortunate to have a mother that said I could do anything, that I am a survivor.  At Mind Body Balance “Can’t” isn’t a word that is said in our studio.  As a matter of fact, it’s grounds for a stern “Kim talking to.”

I will accept phrases like:

• “If not today, tomorrow.”
• “Every time I try I get stronger.”
• “Yes, I can.”
• “I release and let go.”… Etc.

We all have a negative voice in our head.  My negative voice tells me things like, “I’m not good enough, strong enough or worthy enough to get what I want”, etc.  You have these voices too, maybe a mob of voices.  These whispers are always with us, good and bad.

Starting a yoga practice can help quiet these voices and put them into perspective. There is something to be said for being still, quiet, peaceful and content with our body and mind in this fast paced world. Our life paths take us through light and shadows, we constantly are faced with choices between good and evil, truth and lies, kindness and coldness.  These interior voices face off on the battlefield of the mind daily.

Changing our mind’s thoughts to positive (turning down the volume of those negative voices) takes practice.  They can be changed as easily as changing a channel on the television from Jerry Springer to the Discovery channel.  We are what we “turn on” at the moment.  It requires diligent repetition of positive statements, and constant, consistent, constructive application.

Daily practice.  Daily practice.  Daily practice.  Daily practice.  Did I say “Daily practice?”

Over time you will observe your interior voice change.  Along with this, will come a change in your results. Take charge of your inner voice today.  You can tell it what to tell you.  Choose the positive voice.  You are worth it, and more.

Is your inner dialogue overly critical? You deserve to be spoken to in encouraging ways. You have the power to change your critical inner voice to a loving and supportive one.

Post your most reoccurring negative voice here and then tell us how you are going to turn it into a positive. Feel free to help each other turn that negative voice into a positive.  Remember, we are a community at Mind Body Balance.  Inspire others to movement.

How Our Well Being Falls and Why We Should Never Give In

Many health concerns can be avoided!

Many Health concerns can be detected!

Many health concerns can be reversed!

Even Fitness Professionals can stumble badly and recover.

I think this is a good question: How would you know if your health is deteriorating?  To disrespect your body’s needs or worse to neglect your body’s requests because you don’t have time, it’s boring; the arrogance of “I don’t have to.” or “Someday.” is the greatest form of disrespect.  Some of us face an impending demise or disease or injury.  It is still no excuse to just let yourself run on “the autopilot of failing health.”

Really?  If you continue on the course you are on RIGHT NOW! where are you going to be in 10 years? Will it become impossible at that point to remain your best self? Have you lost passion for your own self-care?

Do you think that “quality of life” just comes naturally to you, is your right, so you don’t need to put in any effort? Maybe you think that there is a magic pill out there (or one coming soon) that supplies quality of life, or that a doctor should be able to hand you “good health on a platter” because you deserve it. What about working hard, fighting the odds, believe in your success to good health and partnering with your doctor?  Relationships aren’t one sided.  It takes two to Tango and in this formula, it takes you and your personal health care team.

By team, I mean:

 

• Doctor (GP),
• Fitness professional,
• Dentist
• Doctors (Specialists)
• Nutritionist,
• Body work professional, etc.

 

 

Do you think if I keep doing the same thing that I’ve been doing my health will run on autopilot? Think again.  That is actually Einstein’s definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. You started with this program and saw some results in the beginning but unless you keep renewing it with some creative intensity, you are going to plateau and then digress. Don’t get distracted by extraneous threats, adventures and opportunities.

Make sure that, no matter who you are working with, you understand What you are doing and Why!

You might think: “I’m successful because I exercise 5 times per week.” Not necessarily.

You need to have understanding and insight into why that is.
“I’m successful because I understand why I’m doing yoga 3 times a week, pilates two times a week, cardio four times a week and I am using a personalized eating plan.”
Under what conditions could this no longer work for you?

Yes, the person that I see once, who leaves saying they’ve “Got it.” and all they have to do is hold their belly in or eat more vegetables…..really didn’t get it at all.  You have to constantly be learning about your body and your program.  This is what makes you successful:

• Consistency
• Awareness,
• Learning without judgment, expectations or competition.

Do you have a health care team? Is the team filled with the right people to make you successful in improved quality of life; so that you live with zest? What is your back-up plan in the event that you lose a person on your team? Do you have tools in your tool box and have they taught you self-efficacy so that you can sustain and progress your progress?

We all start out young, thinking our health just “is” no matter what choices we make (or don’t make).   This is usually in the teens and 20’s.  We are undisciplined and pursuing “more of everything.” Then we hit our 30’s.  We are in denial and risk of severe health consequences if we don’t start making better choices concerning our quality of life. We hit our 40’s and we become desperate and grasping for salvation.  What happened?  There should be a joy of being around, being alive, striving for the 20’s vigor for life.  We start asking ourselves questions like, “How did I miss the warning signs?” or looking in the mirror saying “How did I end up looking like this?”  The self-care has been nonexistent for years.

We hit our 50’s and we are facing irrelevance, becoming a burden or death.  You need to remember one word: T-I-M-E.

You can’t change your lifestyle, improve your quality of life, take that trip you dreamed of in your golden years or see that grandbaby’s graduation if you run out of time.

We can save trillions of dollars in health care. We can improve millions of people’s lives if…  If what?

…If we never give in.  Never, never, never, no matter what we are faced with in life.  Never give up your self-care, never give into something big, small, major or petty.  Modify only slightly if an obstacle is placed in your path.  We do this already in everyday life.  If you’re walking and you find a large hole or boulder in your path, you either go through, over or around it.  Never give in to outside forces that challenge or an overwhelming obstacle that has been put in your way.  Never Give In!  You will see darkness on your path, you will suffer a staggering defeat; but to give up on your self-care is entirely out of the question.  Failure to improve your health or to take care of yourself is not so much a physical thing as it is a state of mind.  Success is falling down and getting up one more time and continuing with consistency and without an end in sight.

The Truth About What Motivates us—You May Be Surprised?

This blog is inspired by the book Drive written by Daniel H. Pink, I learned of him during The Global Leadership Summit 2010. I found this book very interesting as he talks about autonomy and motivation. I’m still trying to grasp his theories from a business standpoint to motivate employees.  I follow his concept but am having difficulty with application of it. However, as I read through this book I couldn’t help but put the coloration together on how it related to fitness.  I did understand the application and theory for that because I’ve been teaching and practicing this method since 2007. Frankly, it is the secret to our client’s success!

You see, we start our Fitness Coaching/ Personal Training with Thinking Work.  We talk about the fact that they will fall down at some point during their journey and that at times it stinks, it’s boring, etc. and most importantly we meet our clients “where they are,” allowing them to be in control of their journey, working at a pace that suits them.

Let’s face it; exercise can become really routine and boring.  So we talk about the larger purpose of why we make the lifestyle change and we seek what the true internal motivator really is. We offer a rationale of why the exercise is important to them. We acknowledge that exercise is boring. We allow clients to complete the program with ways that interest them in their own timeline.

Now this doesn’t mean that we allow people to sit and watch TV, wishing for the lifestyle change.  What matters most is consistency, not “race to the finish line, crash and burn.”  Is there a point to running the race if you’re going to crash and burn at the finish?  Don’t even get me started on the brow beating that comes along with the “crashing and burning.”  Brow beating might be the most detrimental part.

Most people are floored when I ask them how starting an exercise program could hurt them.  By “hurt,” I mean their budget, schedule, family time… etc.  Lifestyle change impacts every area of your life, good and bad.

I never agree with financial rewards for accomplishing a plan. For example, “company xyz” will pay each member $100 if they lose weight.  Why?  It is never going to be enough money.  After a while, it won’t work.  More money will be expected.  Money is not a motivator.

I love giving people their lives back. I offer them autonomy. We build a program together that allows clients to do what they want, when they want, how they want it and with whom. I’m lucky that they pick me for “the whom” part because I get to be on their journey as a guide, not a dictator.  When they have these four components (what, when, how, with whom) going in harmony, they emerge as their best self.

Fitness coaching is autonomous! All of our services: Yoga, Pilates, Fitness Coaching, Nutrition workshops… allow you to practice, seeking mastery. It is a practice because you keep at it, you enjoy it, and you move for a greater purpose.  You test your limits by not cheating your body.  We connect you to your intrinsic motivator.  You need to pick modes of activities that keep you striving to improve because over time this gives you energy to keep going.

At Mind Body Balance we don’t have a cookie cutter program.  We do have a system, a system that works.  After sitting and talking to you, we customize the system to your individual needs so that you are successful. We tailor our programs to meet you “where you are” (goals and fitness level).  Together we create visions and goals that have meaning to you, not the trainer. We don’t do short-term goals for extrinsic reasons.  Time and again a person reaches the goal, only to come back later just to have gained back the weight, pain, lowered self-esteem… etc.  We care about our clients and don’t promote this behavior.

Our clients pursue intrinsic goals to improve their quality of life. Yes, it is hard when they are off to a slower start than their friend who is shouting out their “rapid pounds and inches of weight loss” they are experiencing. But that person won’t continue these heroic efforts for long and will be heavier than they’ve ever been in just a short time. Our clients maintain their accomplished goal long term and have significantly better results. I guess you can say they get the last laugh!

Stop doing movement that you hate and start doing movement that you enjoy! We let our clients explore different types of movement to find what best meets their goals and interests. Celebrate the little milestones of your victory. After you’ve accomplished that goal it is okay to treat yourself to a spa service of your choice.

The stick that is used to get you into shape with that carrot dangling in front of it is very passé.  It is time to upgrade your expectations.  Give yourself some self-care and the gift of autonomy, mastery, purpose and self-efficacy.

What you should expect:

• Individualized approach to your program
• The program should match your fitness level and grow with you as you become stronger
• Your program should be efficient, safe, effective to your goal
• You should know the guidelines of your program and why you are doing the things you are doing
• You should be required to provide a health history, Par-Q and a doctors note if you are doing cardio
• You should have felt “heard” and your needs should be met in the program designed for you.  This means it should cover a self-awareness/ discovery piece, physical piece, a nutrition piece, strategy piece to overcome obstacles before they happen, it should build self-efficacy not co-dependence etc.
• You should get some feedback.  This should be a two way conversation

Budgeting: Fast Food vs. Wellness Services?

“It’s amazing how fast you can go through $7,000 with beer, pizza and The Gap.” –Ben Affleck

People groan at the words budget, exercise, and healthy food. Why? They relate sinking, depressed, deprived feelings to these words. Well, if you have these feelings you aren’t alone. To the vast majority of us, it denotes scarcity, deprivation and limitations; none of which seem pleasurable. Exercising usually means eliminating fun, pain, boredom, sweat, feelings of inadequacy, something we do when we are stressed out. This is not my idea.

My idea is designing a plan to achieve healthy (not magazine) bodies; reaching all those goals you would like to accomplish over time without the heroic effort. Movement should be an enjoyable process not a bitter, restrictive, fearful pill to swallow.

An action plan for fitness and healthy eating doesn’t have to be written in stone, it should be flexible, adjustable and one that reflects your values and your life. All of these decisions and commitments that you make give you the power to change so you don’t feel trapped.  You aren’t stuck.  It wouldn’t make sense to create a plan that made you feel stuck. You can change things if you are willing. 

The power of a plan is that you can decide at the beginning of every week or month how you will spend your calories burned/ your fuel you use, how much, when and how. Then when you add up your cumulative calories burnt for the week or month you see whether or not you want to change your decisions for the following month or design a plan that works for you.  Then, work your plan.

I happily move spending calories I burn in the wisest of ways!

Add up your last four week’s receipts of eating out. I would bet if you commit to eating just a portion of those meals at home, you could afford a Fitness Coach, yoga or Pilates very easily. Notice I didn’t suggest to stop eating out completely; just slow the pace a little bit so you can find some balance between eating and moving.

What is the wise thing to do?

Recently Andy Stanley has inspired me to do some self evaluation. I was recently preparing for a leadership conference this year.  When you enrolled early you were gifted a book entitled The Best Question Ever by Andy Stanley. Two weeks before the conference my excitement was building and I thought I probably should give it a quick read before I attend….you know, so I’m prepared and all…..

Of course, like many items that grab us, we always say “If only I had this earlier in life.” But, the truth is, I probably wasn’t ready for it until now.  He said in his book “You can overspend, overeat, and overachieve, but you can’t over-live.”  Lets look at this for a moment.  We all know that our time is limited on earth, right? You would think this would inspire us to look at our life differently, but instead, we all spend our lives asking for more time instead of evaluating how we invest our time we already have.

I think a better idea to ponder would be how to use our current time.  For example, what do you do with all of your extra time? You might be thinking, “Well, I have no extra time.” But, for you parents, I bet you thought you had no extra time when you were single.  You found time for your first, second, and third child. Where did all that “time before children” go?  Away?  Where did your life go? 

I get clients all the time that say, “I know I should take care of myself but I just don’t have the time!” WHAT?  Think about your past experiences (family history your own health history, etc), your current responsibilities (parent, care giver, productive citizen, etc.), your future hopes and dreams (grandkids, children in college, trips in the golden years, etc.).  What is the wisest way to invest in your health?  Now, you are all smart enough to know how to manage your time, see were your time-wasters are and to understand that time is life.  But, often times, we don’t prioritize our health until it is too late.

I see clients that routinely, for years, ignored this very aspect of life.  Then finally something happens in their life and their health gets pushed up the ladder to the top rung. They, of course, are often looking for a quick fix (a magic pill) and get angry that I can not accomplish their goal (reduce pain, lower cholesterol, lose weight, etc.) in just a handful of sessions. It is almost as if they are laying there, thinking, “This won’t work, this isn’t helping me.”etc.

At this point, I tell them, “The body is fluid and has the ability to repair, heal and change over time.  The mind is concrete.”  In other words, if you are saying unkind, negative things while we work together, we should just stop working together.  You are working against your body and you “know” that it won’t change.

You aren’t ready to change your lifestyle until you are ready.  You are only ready when it has nothing to do with the externals floating about in your life.  In one, or even five sessions you aren’t going to see this big difference other than you may be sore and realize that taking back your life is going to be hard work.  Sorry to be the barer of bad news but…  It’s the truth. 

If you allow your exercise sessions and the small lifestyle changes to accumulate… now you are talking about real movement that has a measurable benefit in your life. I know we are a society that wants immediate gratification.  Because exercise doesn’t supply this it is easy for our mind to “fight to be right” and say things like, “It will not hurt if I miss one day.”  Healthy lifestyle factors have a compounding effect.  Consistent, small investments of time have a value.  In the end, that time makes a difference.

If you are like me, you live and learn.  I’ve found myself, many times, wishing I could go back in time and actually listen to my father’s advice.  But I can’t go back.  In fact, we can’t go back for many things such as living, loving, re-prioritizing….the critical aspects of life.  We cannot go back and make up for our mistakes or lost time. You know you’ve done it with your health.  In fact, at the beginning of every year I see it.  Many clients wanting me to brow beat them with outrageous workouts, trying to make up for “that lost time of exercising” in their life.  It’s as if logging 2-3 hours a day makes you feel “in control.”  You’ll feel you’ve regained your footing, then you’ll wake up the next day and have a hard time getting out of bed or you injure yourself.  And so, the brain says, “See, I told you we shouldn’t be doing this.”

Your health matters.  It is one of the top five things that matter in your life and you can’t make up for lost time.  Two of the biggest crises’ that Americans face today are obesity and metabolic diseases; both of which stem from making decisions.  We eat too much.  We spend too much on trends and magic pills.  It isn’t because we make too little income or have too little time.  So we look for others to blame for our behaviors like fast food, finances, employers, etc.

You know something about cars, right?  But most of us don’t work on them by ourselves. You don’t expect your mechanic to make wise suggestions and decisions about your car without first knowing how the car works, right? You don’t try to make wise decisions about your family’s finances without first seeking out a financial planner and knowing the laws and principles that work in these areas of your life.  So, why then, would you not seek help in mastering your health? How would you expect to make wise decisions?

Make a health care team for you today that includes:

• You,
• An integrative fitness professional,
• A doctor that respects movement and nutrition,
• A physical therapist if needed,
• A nutritionist and
• A “body-work” professional.

Lifetime of Legacy!

Some things in life can’t be learned through reading and studying alone.  You know what I’m talking about, the things that we learn through life experience.  Things like learning to appreciate the moment and to savor life as it comes along in what it has to offer us at the time.

As a child, I loved all of my time on the farm. When I entered kindergarten we only went half days, so I thought “Alright I could do this school stuff.”  But then when I advanced to first grade, I had to be in school all day. I announced to my teacher, after a couple of weeks, that I just simply did not have the time to devote to being in school all day, most days of the week. I’m sure this amused and amazed Mrs. Danso. I remember her asking me what was so important that I just couldn’t make school a priority. I began describing that I had a horse to ride, a dog to play with, lunch with my grandparents and walking along the creek that I couldn’t fit in and attend school. Needless to say, her and my parents set me straight on my priorities that day. I quickly fell into line but the school years seemed to drag on and the summers flew by. As I approach my forties, I still long for those farm days of simple, slow, hardworking (but rich in value) days. As I return home on holidays, I spend every day walking and looking at my old haunts and find that they still bring me comfort.  I can still spend a whole day morning to evening in those woods.

Here as an adult I have deep feelings of self-assessment and retrospection.  How have I spent my life?  Will I leave a better place than I found for the generations to come?  Have I (and will I) continue to live up to my capabilities?  I put myself through school at Youngstown State University.  I began my professional adult life in management for large corporations (and was very successful for my age in these companies) but I just wasn’t passionate about it. So, I abandoned this (with my husband’s support) in search for what I was passionate about. I found that passion fairly quickly and it morphed into a business and a passion for movement.  All of which has brought me to the present.

I’m often asked, how did my business (Mind/ Body: Balance) aquire its name? Well, I had approached my husband with the beginnings of my business plan for personal training. He suggested that I try it out on a small scale and be open to allowing my business plan to take on different forms, if need be. I’m glad he suggested that, because I quickly found that my plan of meeting the client in their home or office wasn’t for me. I also knew that being a personal trainer in a gym wasn’t for me either because I felt that this system was failing Americans. He and I then went to a conference together. I attended the first “Inner Idea” and together we attended “IDEA World” in Las Vegas. I remember calling my husband from the inner idea conference and saying that I had found what I was looking for. 

My intuition was right.  There were 500 attendees from 13 countries and we were all on the same page.  We are going to become pioneers in the fitness industry and change lives. Needless to say, Nick was excited to meet me in Las Vegas. He worked the expo, talking with vendors and I worked the education tract. It was this weekend that we developed our business plan, philosophy and named the business. The name came from a course that I took taught by Dr. Ralph LaForge. He has a definition of what makes an exercise program a mind/ body exercise. We view the mind and body as a totality. We strive for a balanced mind/body exercise using three components: cognition, breathing, and physical movement.

 

MIND: Fostering mindfulness and a culture of conscious living, or being engaged in the experience of the present moment, connecting us to a deeper purpose.

BODY: Encouraging the integration of many pathways. Finding the practices that work best for each individual; encouraging a commitment to the essence of learning, discovery and mastery.

 

BALANCE: Cultivating the development of balance in all facets of your life as the centering principle for sustainable well-being.

Mind/ Body: Balance’s ultimate goal is for our clients to transform their mind and body; finding balance through learning and self-discovery.  So when I am looking at adding a service to Mind/ Body: Balance it has to represent most (if not all) of these principles.  As an integrative fitness professional; we realize our clients are a complete package.

What a wonderful journey it has been thus far; and how lucky I have been in making most of my life choices. As many newcomers to America remind me… only in America could I have taken this opportunity and experienced such a dazzling outcome. I married Nick in 2004 and I knew when I met him in 1996 that he would be a life partner that I could count on. I have been blessed to have him there as times have been tough; when I would have given up on myself and my dream.  He reminds me of how “great” I am when I’m feeling down, humbles me if I get too righteous, acts as my sounding board when I need to work through an idea or vent and is always there for a hug when I need one. He pushes me to be better. I have been blessed to start this business in a community that has given me countless customers that are great comfort and give me pleasure in ownership of my business. You’ll see these great folks, customers of Mind/ Body: Balance, dotted all over the United States. They have put in tireless work to change their lives, to improve their quality of life, to change the destiny of their family tree so that it can live long and prosper. They have shared their success and inspired others on their journey to success. I’m amazed at how far Mind/Body: Balance reaches in changing lives.

Remember, life is sweet and we shouldn’t squander it with “I’ll have time to nurture myself when the cows come home.” attitudes. The saddest phrase to hear is someone saying “If only I had…” after they have been diagnosed with a life threatening disease. What we do for ourselves in the form of nutrition and exercise affects our life on all levels.

Thom Moser once said “In spite of all our hopes, plans and dreams, all we ever have is now.”  My hope for my readers, followers, friends, family, clients, and “soon to be” clients is that among your current aspirations, that you will give yourself a gift of improving your quality of life (and taking back your life) through the purchase of a Mind/Body: Balance service. I know that you will pass this journey, this experience, this wisdom on from generation to generation.  Not only will you enhance your life and environment in some measure, you will become a part of the development process of our newest cutting edge programs. We inspire our clients to movement! What movement legacy are you leaving behind?

I climb to outrageous heights of success!

If this whole “economy thing” has taught my husband and me anything, it’s that we never really have a safety net. You think that you have all the basics covered.  You’re living a responsible life.  You’re a productive part of society that your parents would be proud of. But really… there is no safety net.  It is an illusion, if you will. Since this is the case, you might as well soar to tremendous heights and go after your dreams.

Think about it.  There aren’t jobs that can’t be taken away through loss of work or being fired.  No matter how good you are at it. There isn’t a house that can’t be lost to fire, natural disaster or foreclosure. There isn’t a life that can’t be lost to an accident, terminal illness or jewels or wealth that can’t be stolen away or depreciated. Yet we seem to define our entire life by these very things; giving up our dreams, creativity and passion for the illusion of security.

Maybe it is time that we start to re-define who we are as a person.  When you get right down to the fact of the matter… all we really have is the one and only internal self. Go after your hopes and dreams and if you fail (which you are bound to do at times) have the faith and belief that you have what it takes to get back up, that you are still worth fighting for. I know it is very scary, thinking that you can swim with sharks or survive the toughest storm.  But if you seek balance and have goals, grit, determination, will, resilience and creativity you may just find that you can lead a happier life.

I see clients (more often than not) that are afraid if they actually take a lunch and movement break that they won’t look like a team player; that the boss won’t think they are working hard enough or that they could lose their job for taking a walk and eating away from the office. This is really sad to me because getting up and moving, stretching and eating mindfully makes us more energized, pain free and increases productivity. Or the story about the obese, sedentary, diabetic worker who had to pass a physical to keep their job was afraid to tell their doctor that they are exercising and share their fitness and eating diaries because they had convinced themselves that it could get them fired. WHAT?

Let me just go off on a rant here.  If you can’t take time to eat a mindful lunch, walk around from time to time and or share your movement success with your boss for whom all of these actions help improve your quality of life, productivity and health. Than maybe you are either working for the wrong the company, have the wrong doctor or you need to revaluate your beliefs and thoughts because they are leading you to an unhealthy lifestyle and that, in and of itself, will jeopardize your job security not the healthy lifestyle choices.

“Doubt destroys. Faith builds!” – Robert Collier

Put Fear Behind YOU and Drive Health and Prosperity YOUR Way!

What we do today will set us steps apart from others that led a sedentary lifestyle today and miles apart in the years to come. We have a choice. There are two sides to a coin. We can choose; “FEAR”, negative attitude and thoughts, or “FUTURE/ HOPE”, positive attitude and thoughts. We have the ability to choose. What do you choose? My motto lately has been to “Overcome Fear, Choose Hope and Discover Personal Victory for my health, even if it is by the skin of my teeth!”

I know you’ve heard someone say “Look, just change your thinking, change your behavior or get some backbone.” Right? Well, the equation to staying healthy is simple but actually living it is difficult. So, you might be thinking “There is no hope for me. I’m past the point of return.” Or, “These things you’ve been suggesting in this blog don’t work for me.” I have a question for you: ARE YOU DOING THEM? Consistently? Everyday?

Look, I know from personal experience and through my clients that you probably aren’t and that you are filling your head with negative, self sabotaging, limiting beliefs. Do you clench at the fact that you are going to have to put that dress or suit on that made its way back to the far reaches of the closet? Do you have anxiety attacks because you have to go clothes shopping for a special event and you don’t know what size you’ll be in? I know those mirrors at the department store don’t seem to work like the mirrors at home right J Do you get all  envious at co workers, friends and family when they are talking about their personal health success, the pounds they lost, the energy they have, their latest blood work was great, etc. Well, you need to start reprogramming yourself. Put a different record on in your head.

It is time to dream and build your best self based on your values and principals. Forget about the past, forget about the future.  Neither exists and we have no control over them.  One has already happened and the other hasn’t happened yet. Each morning, when you wake up, focus on the now, that day. Ask yourself, “What are five steps I could take today, contributions, achievements, and results?” Focus on what you can do for that 24 hour period. In doing this, you will be creating a bright future. Look for:

• Opportunities to act on
• Value you can create
• Relationships you can build
• Dream and build your “best self” based on your values and principles
• Gratitude, Gratitude, Gratitude

 

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity…it turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

 

–New York Times Writer Melodie Beattie

 Identify what fears are stopping you from moving forward, chose hope and focus on the now. Affirmations are a very powerful tool. They help us stop that negative mind chatter and to stay positive and focused. Sometimes, when we first make an affirmation, it makes no sense to us. An Affirmation is a positive statement affirming or asserting something to manifest. Think about the “Law of Attraction.” You get what you think about.  Your thoughts determine your destiny. If you can dream it, it honors your values, and you develop an action plan.  You can put on a “new record” and conquer success. My affirmations work for me whether I believe they do or not.

Build Your Intention and Find Success

Have you ever been near someone and was amazed at their positive winning attitude about life? I bet you sat there thinking, Wow!  If only I had a thimble full of their energy.” Then, as time carried you on with this person, you probably started feeling inadequate about your own accomplishments and dismissed this person as annoying and over the top.

Is your intention and commitment not strong enough to prioritize your health both emotional and physically.  “Perfect health is above gold; a sound body before riches.”

 –Solomon

 

We need to understand that change has different stages and the first thing you need to do is find out why you won’t, or can’t, change to a healthy lifestyle. Is it because you need more information on the pros to making the change? Is it because you need more information to overcome your cons? Maybe you don’t think you have a problem that needs to change! Possibly you are just overwhelmed and feel like making change isn’t even an achievable task.

Well, the first step is to start doing some thinking. Yes, there is a thinking part to changing a lifestyle. You need to get in touch with and connect with your intrinsic motivator. Finding this intrinsic motivator will help you shift your ambivalence to commitment.

Take some time to think about how an exercise program or eating mindful meals will help you or hurt you in a sense of taking up your time, money and the obstacles in your path.  Make a list of pros and cons that might help you sort through your thinking and help you determine when to make the change if it is not right now! Sign up for Mind/ Body: Balance’s newsletter “Balancing Act” at www.mindbodybalance.com so that you can obtain information about a healthy lifestyle while you go through this process. Then, when something speaks to you, dig deeper.

Be an observer of those around you. Do you know someone who has declared (out loud) their success in adapting a healthy lifestyle? Observe how they do it, their determination, confidence, their ability to succeed and most importantly their attitude toward this healthy lifestyle! Now, don’t run right out and try to do their routine and think you can maintain it. They’ve been practicing this behavior for some time. Start small and build on that step by putting one step in front of the other.  Before you know it, you will have built a strong foundation on which to build your healthy lifestyle. Set yourself up for success! For example, start with just a 10 minute walk after lunch, then start doing a 10 minute walk after lunch and dinner, then start doing a 10 minute walk after every meal. Build consistence with these steps before moving on.

Visualize yourself being successful at each step before you actually set out to do it. Don’t focus on your fear of failure. Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real.  Chellie Campbell said “ Confidence sells –Fear Repels.” You are a winner, You will win and win big when you tackle your health and you deserve to have quality of health. Remember the three Rs: Respect yourself, Respect others, Responsible Living Today, tomorrow and always!

“Nothing transforms a person faster than changing from a negative to a positive attitude.” –Paul C. Bragg.  You have the ability to alter your life by choosing to change your attitude!

Love Your Body!

It is Valentine’s Weekend! My sweetie is in another state but it left me reflecting on love.

“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way.  It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance”

 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7

I believe this was part of our marriage ceremony on May 29, 2004. Go back and read it again and were it says “Love and It” put your name in instead. I know my heart sunk a little when I did this myself. I have some areas that I need to do some work like irritable, patient, keep no record of being wronged. Ugh, I need to work on these!

If we can’t love our own bodies how can we give love to our friends and families around us? “Love is not a matter of counting the years —it’s making the years count” –William Smith. We need to treat our body with respect feed and care for it in a respectful healthy way instead of abusing it through unhealthy diets, sedentary lifestyles or if I cause it pain I must be working out the right way. You can accomplish a healthy diet and an active lifestyle through non heroic efforts.

I personally believe in affirmations. I have a master affirmation of “I’m creating a beautiful day for myself. My work as a business, owner, teacher, writer, speaker, classical Pilates teacher yoga master trainer and coaching is fulfilling. I am happy healthy fit successful and prosperous. Clients are aboundate they are everywhere I turn. My corporate well being programs are sought out by many. I have a wonderful relationship with my husband that continues to grow. Everything is as it should be. I can let go.” –Kimberly Searl  

I say this affirmation multiple times a day. If there is a particular area that I’m struggling with then I make a smaller one to repeat every time that fear or negative thought creeps into my head such as “ I always have plenty of money, I can let go, I am hot and awesome, I have a wonderful relationship with my husband” you get the picture. I say these especially during movement. Look, if you are on the treadmill listing all these negative thoughts on why you won’t be successful, why you can’t lose weight etc. then guess what? You are self sabotaging your efforts and you are right… you won’t accomplish your health goals. But, if you are starting a new habit (which takes 21 straight days of doing it by the way) then you need to list an affirmation in the present tense and then, when you are faced with the fork in the road, you can go back to that present tense affirmation and say, “I can’t control the past or the future. I can control the present moment. Will I make the choice to honor my affirmation or not?”

Please know that these blogs come, not from a perfect wellness professional who had always towed the line without falter or for whom life has always been easy. I’ve had to learn life the hard way through personal trial and error. I always try to learn from mistakes and do a self evaluation. I’d like to say I get it right after the second time down the street but sometimes it takes me a little longer to get the whole picture of taking a different street all together. I’ve been a victim throughout my life, paralyzed, depressed, drugged, obese I believe in not crying victim because repeating those stories over and over just keep me in the victim mindset and brings the wrong energy into my universe. Yes, I’ve shed many tears over some of my experiences but I know that it is a test of character and that in a year or two down the road I will be stronger for it. This is what gives me the strength and ability to relate because I’ve been there. This is how I know that you have the power, strength and courage in you to tackle your health no matter the personal circumstances you are facing today.

Here are some guidelines for making your own affirmation:

Affirmations are very powerful.  They are a powerful tool. Sometimes, when we make an affirmation, it makes no sense.  An affirmation is a positive statement affirming or asserting something to manifest. Think about the “Law of Attraction.” You get what you think about.  Your thoughts determine your destiny. To write your own affirmation, begin with “I.”  Eliminate “should.”  Avoid any negativity.  Avoid hope, wish, and try.  It should evoke a strong feeling in you.